Have you ever considered becoming a teacher at a school? Thanks to Eathrabaria and their latest game, ‘Schoolteacher Simulator’, you can now mould young minds and prepare our younglings for the outside world. Today, we will find out whether I have what it takes to be a great teacher and if my students will go on and achieve greatness.

In Schoolteacher Simulator, players take on the role of a teacher in a local school. You must teach kids but ensure your students stay focused during the lesson and react if they misbehave, making sure you also stay vigilant during breaks and resolve problems between your pupils during school breaks.

Each day has unique events like singing competitions, bus trips, sports competitions and dramas around different places in the school. This sounds like we are in for quite the treat, right? Let’s not waste any more time and look at what’s in the teacher’s top desk drawer.

During the very short campaign that runs less than an hour, players must complete a variety of very simple objectives. The vast majority of the objectives that you need to complete can be handled by simply left-clicking on your mouse or pressing the corresponding key on your keyboard.

While patrolling the school grounds during lunch breaks, players will come across a few unruly trouble-makers and are presented with the first of the player-choice interactions.

After a couple of playthroughs, however, I discovered that other than a different voice line, the choices that I made had zero impact on the end results. I am a big fan of player choice impacting a game’s ending and progression, sadly though, this time around, I was left utterly disappointed, and the hits just kept coming.

Schoolteacher Simulator tries to touch on some very sensitive subject matter, and while I feel like these are great topics to explore, the way that they are approached and dealt with is deplorable. Had any of these topics been approached with the appropriate care, the campaign would have had a much more profound impact.

Instead, I am left feeling nothing but anger and rage at how this was handled. Now that I’ve had my protective parent moment. Let’s take a look at the visuals.

Visuals are a mixed bag. Some areas around the school grounds have a high level of photorealism, while other areas, like the school bus and campgrounds, look very out of place. There are a lot of areas where you can clip through walls and even fall through the map, which you’ll need to force close the game to rectify meaning even the gameplay is defective.

While doing some developer research, I stumbled upon a horrible truth, each and every character model is an asset flip straight out of Eathrabaria’s previous titles.

The majority of the character voice lines and game soundtrack have been generated with AI. I can certainly appreciate the powerful tool that AI can be, having put together some of my own music with it, however, in this particular case, the voice lines that have been delivered are not great.

Character voice lines lack any feeling in their delivery, and some words are mispronounced. The handful of characters that have had real people record them do sound better but lack tonality. I do applaud the volunteers who lent their voices, at least they tried.

Schoolteacher Simulator is a very short game that tries to deliver a teaching experience like no other. There are some very heavy-hitting topics touched on that are worth exploring, however, how they have been managed in this title will just leave you angry. Eathrabaria, you have failed this exam. Please try better next time for some extra credit.

Written by: Gary Nielsen